Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Background Exercises, No. 1

It's been stated before that this reference blog exists solely as a public service for the education of the witless individuals unaware of the BikeSnobNYC evolution. Indeed, it has been nigh three and fifty fortnights since the inaugural post, and yet questions still arrive with growing frequency. Therefore, in order to fulfill another 15 minutes of community service I've compiled a few archetypal RTMS posts. These "classics" contain some basic background information -

It's All in the Details* Thursday, June 21, 2007.
The BSNYC Aesthetic is born; basic cycling faux pas are characterized; Pie Plate fatwa initiated.

Seven Signs of the Fixed-Gear Apocalypse Thursday, June 28, 2007.
"And when the Lamb had opened the seventh seal, there was silence in heaven about the space of half an hour"... and then Vespas were purchased. (Revelation 8:1).

Five Reasons I Hate Being a Cyclist Monday, July 2, 2007.
Typical classic Snob - before he jumped the snark.

This Just In: Deep-Section Rims Provide Excellent Opportunity for Self-Expression! Thursday, April 10, 2008.
AYHSMB!

Time and tide wait for no man.
-Geoffery Chaucer

Thursday, June 18, 2009

IOJB - The Ironic Orange Julius Bike


via k-wall blog


There's a specific tool for every job - every cyclist knows this.

It's an egregious faux pas to run your crabon fibre Cervélo on your four mile (30km) commute, or to slay some firetrails without at least 100mm of "squish". However, due to the present state of the world, one can now practice such flagrant offenses by using the Umbrella of Irony. The IOJB is the embodiment of this idea, due to the fact that, seriously, nobody goes to Orange Julius. Snob himself stated that he owns the IOJB due to his/her "soft spot for soft drink tribute bikes", not that he actually goes to Orange Julius.

When it comes down to it, the IOJB is just an idea, since only Snob knows the true nature of his bike. Much like the frequent donning of the Chicken Suit, the IOJB is a literary device straddled often to maintain anonymity. It's not known if it is even orange in color. However, it does have fenders (to defend against goose leavings), which leads me to believe that there exists some eyelets of practicality in the orange seatstays of irony.